The Art of Asking - "Finding Neutral" Part 3

³⁹ Going a little ahead, he fell on his face, praying, “My Father, if there is any way, get me out of this. But please, not what I want. You, what do you want?”  Matthew 26:39 The Message.

Probably the hardest place to find in prayer is neutral.  You may think “if God is going to do it his way anyway, why should I pray?” Or, being full of emotions and a heart bent toward selfishness, “how can I ever know for sure that I am neutral about my request?”

If you have ever driven a manual transmission vehicle, then you understand how important it is to find neutral.  Yes automatics have a neutral position, but neutral for a manual is found while moving between every gear.  On older motorcycles the gear shift is under your left foot.  You have to find neutral in order to know the bike’s present gear.  Neutral for a manual transmission is a place of rest and a pause for the gears to reconnect while moving to another speed.

Think about our verse for one moment.  Jesus “asked” his Father to find another way besides the cross.  He was about to endure “drink” suffering, humiliation, pain, desertion, being completely helpless, isolation from his Father (which he had never ever experienced before), experience the shame and guilt of sin (not just his, but the full weight of all of our sin), public nakedness, ridicule, physical torture, and finally death.  Twice it is recorded that he prayed for the same request.  The third time ended in a resolve to follow the path set before him.  In some respects Jesus was denied his request in order that God’s purposes would be fulfilled.  On the other hand, Jesus request included finding neutral so that he trusted his Father to help him walk the path to death on the cross.

So why is it so hard to “find neutral” when we bring our prayers before the Lord?

1.    We want to control the outcome of our prayers.  Many times we are asking God to meet our request, but we have consciously or unconsciously already determined how God should answer our request.  Conversations with God which include listening will allow God to filter through any hidden motives or agendas.  God is willing to wait as long as it takes for us to see our selfishness in our prayers

2.   We want to live life by sight and not faith.  Faith is the evidence of things unseen.  We want to see the answer first and then apply our faith to it.  Faith comes from hearing God’s word which means both reading and listening to the Holy Spirit.  Boldness in the request comes when you know already by faith that God is stirring the waters.  Peter and John said “silver and gold we do not have, but we will share what we have (authority and power from God to ask for healing in Jesus name), rise and walk.

3.   Fear.  Fear dominates some lives more than others.  Some will not even begin to ask God for things, because they are afraid of how He might answer.  Our relationship with our earthly dads has a direct impact in the way that we approach God with request.  If we grew up being unsure (afraid) how dad would respond to our request, or if there was very little conversation, or if he appeared to always say no, then we might approach God with the same attitudes.  We might feel that God doesn’t want to help us, he is too busy, or he might get mad at our request.  We surmise that if it is going to get done, we will just have to do it ourselves.  All of these emotions and fears are road blocks for us to “find neutral”.

Can’t we just ask God for things, why is important that we “find neutral”?

One of God’s desires for us as his children is intimacy in relationship.  This special bond usually occurs when doing life together.  It is more than just shared events,  it also includes all of the dialogue and laughter during that time together.  However, much of what we call prayer is more like approaching God like a vending machine.  We hope to uncover the right sequence of coins in order to push the button and receive our request.  That is not relationship.

“Finding neutral” helps us to know God better and to understand ourselves better.  Sometimes God waits to answer our request, because of our request.  If I keep telling God to give me a coke, when in reality he wants me to have a lemonade.  He may just not answer my request until I get to the place of asking him what I should have.  When I drink the lemonade, which is super fantastic with just the right amount of strawberry flavoring, I understand that He knows me better than I know myself.

The uncovering of our hidden attitudes leads us to a place of brokenness and trust.  This position allows God to move in our behalf in which He receives all of the glory in bringing about the answer to our request.

Let me close with a story.

Katy transferred to a private college to finish her last two years of college.  My path of ministry did not produce large savings for my children’s tuition.  New laws keep banks from providing loans to cover the full amount of the difference between school sponsored scholarships and the full tuition…at least that is the way it appears.  Students or parents have to make up the difference each semester.  This private college needed several thousand dollars each semester.

As we went to move in weekend, I was so excited for her to enjoy college life.  But I also knew, that I had little to no money to help make this a reality for her.  I did not even know how to ask God.  I was discouraged. “Why didn’t I chose a more lucrative path that would provide for my family?”  “Does God really provide for his children?” “What good is it to help people in ministry and fail at providing for my family?”  I felt very low as a father in providing for our family.

During that weekend, I confessed my lack of faith and repented for my lack of trust in God as provider.  I “found neutral” in that I gave up trying to figure out a solution and recommitted my faith in God who loves me.

About 1 week later I drove up to my property and a man in a truck was looking at my property.  He introduced himself as working for Alabama Power.  He wanted to buy the back of my property to expand the right of way for new power lines.  He said that he would have to remove the trees along that right of way.  He offered a price.  I asked him which trees and he went higher on the price.  We walked up to the fence line and he offered a higher price.  When we returned to his truck, he offered an even higher price for the purchase of the right of way.  I NEVER asked for more, I was just asking for understanding of what would happen and how they would remove or cut the trees.  We signed papers and he told me that a check for $6000 would arrive in about 4 or 5 days.  It was SURREAL.  God provided.  The one who owns cattle on a thousand hills, found a few trees to provide for my needs. 

There was NO WAY I could have made this happen, BUT GOD loves his children.

So, what about you?  How do you “find neutral”?  How do you relinquish your will and desires so that God may have his perfect way in and through your life?